What Are Women Supposed to Do in Order Not to Be Sexually Harassed in the UK?

 

The question itself reveals the sickness. We ask women what to do, as if the onus were on them to outwit predators, as if harassment were a weather pattern they should learn to forecast and dodge. The implication is clear: men will harass, unless women perform the proper rituals to avoid it. This is the language of a culture that excuses the perpetrator and deputises the victim. Let’s play along for a moment. What should women do? They should, apparently: Dress modestly, but not so modestly they “draw attention.” Avoid walking alone, but also avoid relying on men for safety because that’s “weak.” Speak up when harassed, but not too loudly, lest they be called hysterical. Defend themselves physically, but not so forcefully they cause injury (because then they may face charges). Avoid alcohol, public transport late at night, certain neighbourhoods, certain jobs, certain smiles, certain eye contact… In short: exist, but invisibly. This impossible list is not a safety plan; it’s a containment strategy. Not for the perpetrators, for the women. It says: Shrink your life until it fits the comfort zone of men who cannot behave themselves. The logical extension of this “advice” is that women should never leave their homes. Even then, harassment will arrive via text, workplace Zoom calls, or the man in the next flat. In truth, there is nothing a woman can do that will guarantee immunity, because the variable is not her behaviour, but the harasser’s. And yet, we cling to the myth that women can “prevent” harassment through their choices, because it comforts us. It means we can pretend harassment is not inevitable and more importantly, that we can avoid confronting the real problem: that some men feel entitled to treat women as public property. The answer to the question, then, is brutally simple: There is nothing women can do to stop being sexually harassed. The only solution is for men to stop harassing them, for bystanders to stop tolerating it, and for the justice system to treat harassment as a crime worth punishing. Until that shift happens, we are not asking women to “stay safe”, we are asking them to live under soft house arrest. The UK can keep pretending the problem is women’s behaviour, or it can admit the problem is men’s behaviour. It cannot do both.